Recycled Stories = Culture

Our culture – any culture – is made up of a series of stories, recycled over and over again. We need to be turning many gendered stories on their head and throwing them into a woodchipper. Ok, fine I’d settle for a large bottle of white out.

Here are three actions I invite you to do, starting today.

First, let’s change … our cultural storytelling… to be balanced with many more stories, that focus on the heroism of girls. We need to keep demanding and supporting books, films and other media forms that tell the stories of female heroism, and empower our youngest of girls. So when you read a children’s book or watch children’s video, notice – is there a female protagonist and if so, how is she portrayed? A doctor with courage, conviction and compassion? Or a twirly ballerina with a high pitched voice who plays second? Nothing again ballerina’s, really. However there is so much more our girls can do, physically, if we would create the role models for them.

Secondly, we need to focus on early childhood education. For example, in the United States, almost 60% of American children attend preschool or daycare. Inquire about the unspoken / gender bias of the teachers. Because this bias, in an unintentional and casual way, can undercut stories of a girls’ worth and power. Does the teacher say “Good morning Lauri – don’t you look pretty in that dress?” or “Tom, can you carry these wooden blocks? What a strong boy you are”.

And thirdly it comes down to you and me. It is important that we are mindful of our gender bias, and our everyday actions – what we do and say. Are WE reinforcing that girls can be intelligent, powerful AND nurturing. Do we compliment lauri for wearing a dress but then tell her she can’t climb a tree? Do we buy Lauri dolls and princesses, while Tom get legos and cars? Do we think it’s acceptable when Tom kisses Lauri, without asking her permission?

I’m envisioning my young daughter now. In her world, girls and boys share equality, and both can be intelligent and powerful. At 13, she raises her hand in school to ask questions, and doesn’t think so much about whether she has the right or wrong answer – it’s ok to not be perfect. At 18, she chooses a college major that she is passionate about and doesn’t overthink it. Throughout her life, she negotiates her position (at home and at work), because she recognizes the contribution she is to the world. And at some point, she is invited to sit on a Board of directors, or runs for public office – whatever it is, she is led by her internal leader.

Imagine a world where we are creating young women who learn these attributes of leadership at the youngest of ages. Children won’t understand the gender policing that they now know. Girls’ brains will be wired towards heroism because we show them they can do anything. They can explore new worlds if they’re willing to be curious. They can be anything if they’re willing to stand in their conviction. They can achieve anything if they have courage and and connect with others.

It’s time that we all started sharing stories of female heroines — like the first female president of Iceland, or the Princess who saves the village from the monster, or even your own acts of heroism. We need more stories where girls speak up, stand up, and rise up.

So here is my final question to you — what stories are you going to tell?